Saturday, October 31, 2009
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Monday, October 26, 2009
Friday, October 16, 2009
This Iced Coffee condensation mark confirms it.
I'm announcing the H2O10 Party. In the next decade, the water level will rise, rivers will dry up, and earth is go'n get hot! We'll need to raise awareness and that begins at home. In the backyard. In a pool.
Details coming soon. Jokes/puns about water coming sooner.
Let Andrew W.K. get us all wet, Summer 2010.
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
I know she's a joke to people like you and me, but I really have limited knowledge (?) of Miley Cyrus's catalogue of music. So everytime I hear it, I think it's funny, especially by how excessively delightful it tries to be. So when I tell you that I laughed out loud during her first singing part in this mashup, you know I'm telling the truth.
Sunday, October 11, 2009
My New Hollywood Friends! Me, John Travolta, And My Thumb Disguised As A Penis Disguised As John Travolta
What a party we had this weekend! John Travolta kept doing amazing dance moves from Saturday Night Fever while quoting Pulp Fiction, just so I would give him a thumbs up, just so he could catch a glimpse of himself, in penis version, drawn on my thumb.
A Dogged Taliban Chief Rebounds, Vexing U.S.
In late 2001, Mullah Muhammad Omar’s prospects seemed utterly bleak. The ill-educated, one-eyed leader of the Taliban had fled on a motorbike after his fighters were swiftly routed by the Americans invading Afghanistan.
Eight years later, Mullah Omar leads an insurgency that has gained steady ground in much of Afghanistan against much better equipped American and NATO forces. Far from a historical footnote, he represents a vexing security challenge for the Obama administration, one that has consumed the president’s advisers, divided Democrats and left many Americans frustrated.
“He’s a semiliterate individual who has met with no more than a handful of non-Muslims in his entire life. And he’s staged one of the most remarkable military comebacks in modern history.”
He was born, by various accounts, in 1950 or 1959 or 1960 or 1962. He may be hiding near Quetta, Pakistan, or hunkered down in an Afghan village. No one is sure.
“He can’t operate openly; there are too many people looking for him,” and the eye he lost to Soviet shrapnel in the 1980s makes him recognizable.
Saturday, October 10, 2009
The e-mails will come once a day (if there is a new post), and will include all posts made since the last email.
Personally, I hope you'll keep coming to the site instead, but if you prefer this style, who am I to stop you!?!?!?!
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
Monday, October 5, 2009
Cartman will begrudgingly be forced to visit a Town Hall meeting in South Park, which someone will speak really positively of (something like "the dialogue of the people and their local government is the bedrock of our democracy"). That character, or more likely Randy, will then go fucking crazy over health care in the town hall meeting.
Cartman is so impressed he invites his friends to join him at the next one. They will go, and Cartman will yell his mind out and all the towns people will think he's great. Then one will yell something like "We don't want death panels!" and Cartman will have a moment like "YEAH! Wait, what?"
Cartman will then realize he is for health care reform because he really wants to get on a death panel.
Where it goes from there is probably dependent on whatever the B story of the episode is. That's all I got for now!
Sunday, October 4, 2009
Prince - musicology
Cut Copy - Saturdays
Chic - i want your love (todd terje edit)
Dr. Hook - Clyde
Montell Jordan - This Is How We Do It
The Roots - The Seed 2.0
Boyz II Men - Motownphilly
Jay Z featuring Rihanna and Kanye - Run This Town
Akon - I'm So Paid (Ft. Lil' Wayne)
Bruce Springsteen - I'm On Fire (Cousin Cole's Bad Desire Mix)
LCD Soundsystem - Daft Punk Is Playing At My House
John Lennon - Oh Yoko!! (Pocketknife's Numero Ono Refix)
Paul Simon - Late (DJ Spun Edit)
Daft Punk - One More Time
Michael Jackson - Billie Jean
Prince And The Revolution - Kiss
Juvelen - Don't Mess
The Rapture - House Of Jealous Lovers
Beyonce - Single Ladies (Put A Ring On It)
Nelly - Hot in herre
Lady GaGa - Poker Face
The Juan MacLean - Happy House
Michael Jackson - Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough
TV on the Radio - Crying
Beyonce - Crazy in Love (feat. Jay-Z)
Gnarls Barkley - crazy
Outkast/Andre 3000 - Hey Ya!
Missy Elliott - Work It
Cut Copy - Hearts On Fire
Daft Punk - Digital Love
Kylie Minogue - Can't Get You Out Of My Head
Justin Timberlake - Justin Timberlake _ SexyBack
Britney Spears - Toxic OK
Rihanna - Umbrella (feat. Jay-Z)
Ratatat - Seventeen Years
The Knife - Heartbeats
R. Kelly - Ignition - Remix
Hercules & Love Affair - Blind
Hot Chip - Ready For The Floor
Justice - D.a.n.c.e
LCD Soundsystem - Yeah (Crass Version)
Hall & Oates - I Can't Go For That (Ben Liebrand Mix)
Paul Simon - Diamonds on the Soles of Her Shoes (Todd Terje dub)
Mariah Carey - '97 Mariah Carey - Honey (LP Version)
Usher - Love in this Club Feat. Young Jeezy
Lauryn Hill - Doo Wop (That Thing)
Ol Dirty Bastard - Got Your Money ft Kelis
Bruce Springsteen - Tougher Than The Rest (Martin Vogel Edit)
Radiohead - Creep
Tracy Chapman - Fast Car
Beck - Debra
America - Ventura Highway
Pocketknife & Cousin Cole - My My Hey Hey (Cousin Cole Into The Blue Remix)
Tom Petty - Don't Come Around (Tiedye edit)
Funkadelic - One Nation Under A Groove
roxy music - avalon (lindstrom & prins thomas rmx)
Rod Stewart - Loosing You (Heavy Disco edit)
The Beatles - Tomorrow Never Knows (Leftside Wobble Edit)
Phil Collins - I'm Not Moving (Idjut Boys edit)
Peech Boys - Don't Make Me Wait (Todd Terje Edit)
Fleetwood Mac - You Make Lovin' Fun (Trailmix)
Eddy Grant - Electric Avenue
Glass Candy - Geto Boys (Vocal)
Son Of Sound - Life Under Bridges
Glass Candy - Animal Imagination
Marc Hype - Marc Hype & Jim Dunloop - Al Naafiysh (The Soul)
Fleetwood Mac - Keep On Going (Cosmo Vitelli Edit)
Skyy - First Time Around (Cosmo Vitelli Edit)
Still Going - Spaghetti Circus
Cut Copy - Saturdays
Sebastien Tellier - Kilometer (Aeroplane 'Italo 84' Remix)
LCD Soundsystem - Yeah (Crass Version)
Lindstrøm & Prins Thomas - Tirsdagsjam (Lang Versjon)
Daniel Wang - Like Some Dream
America - Horse With No Shame (Todd Terje Edit)
Bobby Womack - Across 110th Street
Saturday, October 3, 2009
Tonight, October 3rd, I will be DJing the Electric Dougaloo in Venice, CA. In our new magic democracy, we gon' elect TRICKS!
Apparently, This Week I Started My New Hobby, Drunk Letter-Writing: DEAR NICOLAS CAGE'S FILM COMPANY,
[ed. note 2] uh oh, i think i may be having delusions of grandeur by censoring my phone number. don't forget jim carrey's poignant cry for help "somebody STOP me!"
Dear Saturn Films,
Almost 10 years ago, I met Nicolas Cage at a Christie's car auction at Pebble Beach. I don't remember the year - an Alfa Romeo sold for 4.7 million dollars.
Anyway! He signed my program which meant a lot to me. Fast forward to today... I moved to LA four weeks ago to try to write for TV and I would love to spend my time working for Saturn Films. For free, even. Why? Please keep reading...
I honestly think about how much Nicolas Cage is a genius at least once a day. I am incredibly excited about Bad Lieutenant. Nic and Werner really are my creative dream team, and it would mean so much to me to work for talent I really believe in.
I would love a phone interview if you'd consider it.
Friday, October 2, 2009
If you've got a baby by then, he or she can at bottle-stand beside you while you do a keg stand! You know how many times I wish I had a sippy cup when I was getting DRUNK? Actually, you better ask all the LADIES I spilled on, KNOWWHATIMEAN!?! N-U!!!
Then, when we're all PREGAMED OUT we'll go jangle our keys at Michael Phelps when he races up at SPAC. Hey Michael, are you still ripping bongs? Because I know some dudes up at DELTA CHI who have an aquabong that even Aquaman AKA you couldn't even take! FIRST DOWN NORTHWESTERN!!!
Awwww sheeeeeet looks like MY BOY Usain Bolt will be runnin' the 400m up at Ryan Welsh field. Aww crap all the way up north? Fuck that noise! Okay okay we'll PREGAME a little bit. What's that you say? Usain isn't running for America!?!?!? HIS NAME HAS "USA" IN IT? Yo what's your O'problem Obama? You should have invaded Jamaica so we could have Usain Bolt run for us. You must hate America. Hopefully by the next Olympics there won't just be a USA IN BOLT, there'll be a USA IN JAMAICA, catchmydrifthomie??
OKAY OKAY MY FAVORITE PART THOUGH SERIOUSLY GUYS WE GOTTA GET TO THIS
LeBron JAMES representin' USA at WELSH RYAN ARENA baby C'MON you gotta love BRONBRON. Wa-wait a second... he got a better contract with the KNICKS so he's not playing for the Olympic team? THAT ISN'T EVEN A CONFLICT OF INTEREST!!! Well, my KNICKIES KNow just how to screw me over YEAH BOYEE!!! fuck hometown pride leBRONNYBROOK YOGURT JAMES you go where da money at!
SEE ALL MY WILDCATS SOON!