Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Time Outlaws 2

"We have to go back."

Dear fellow Time Outlaws:

Jack Camaro here. If you are receiving this, for the past year you've done what you do best: escaping the law (or for you pre-Hammurabi-outlaws, escaping vengeful deities).

Last year, for those of you who did not attend, I arranged for a night of political asylum for outlaws of all time to come and party - that was March 20, 2009 (link).

(From last year)

The deal I made with every President up to Lord Tyrant O'Roomba was made on the condition that all outlaws would return to their times.

That was foolish. One of you broke the rules, and life as we know it is now in jeopardy.

You see, one of you has disrupted the timeline, creating an alternate-2085. In this year, Lord Tyrant O'Roomba's mysterious vacuum certificate appears, which causes a series of destructive events to unfold.

(It looks like this)

The certificate reveals O'Roomba was actually built with O'Reck technology. A vacuum of leadership enables Vice Tyrant Glenn O'Reck to rise to Supreme Lord.

Why? Why did we vote for a Vice Tyrant with an eyepatch!?

Make no mistake, O'Reck is even more evil than his predecessor. Conspiracy theorists believe he's Dick Cheney rebuilt with Oreck technology. The only evidence of this is that he totally sucks.

I know this is really confusing, so if you need help understanding, just rent the Porno-flick loosely based on this story, Clock Rogues 2.

(For all you wondering, yes, that is Sheriff Vortex in the middle)

Time Outlaws! Assemble and recreate the night of March 20th 2009 on Saturday March 27th, 2010 at Royal Oak to save our timeline and ensure Lord Tyrant O'Roomba's vacuum certificate is never discovered!

If you did not attend the first party, you can still attend! Outlaws gotta party!


Time Outlaws 2: Timefuck.
Royal Oak. (map)
March 27th, 2010 at 10 pm.
No outlaw attire necessary.

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